Thoughts on Twilight

This morning, like most of our mornings, Rob and I had the Today Show on while we were eating breakfast. One of their feature stories was about the release of the latest Twilight series movies, ‘New Moon’ that comes out tonight at midnight. Now, I must make a disclaimer that I did read all Twilight books in a row this summer, (thanks to my teenage sister-in-law Kayla for lending those to me) and yes, I did enjoy them. I also did rent the first Twilight film, but didn’t see it in the theatres (side note: the book was way better than the movie in my opinion). I say that to tell you I am not against Twilight as a whole – I think good themes of love, self-control, friendship and courage come through in the books. Here’s what really gave me pause this morning watching the segment on TV – a poster a woman on Rockefeller Plaza was holding that said, “Yes, I’m in love with a fictional character!” I’m going to go out on a limb here and suggest that she means Edward – I could be wrong, but for the sake of my post, I will say that.

Hold the phone please – that is disturbing. To say that you are “in love” with someone implies that you have a reason to love that person. What reason has Edward given her to “love” him? (And I’m using love in quotes here because I do not think this woman is really “in love” with Edward – she is “in love” with the idea of him – obvious point considering he’s a fictional character!) To love someone first should probably mean he/she is a real person and secondly true love is very different than infatuation which I would pose is actually what this woman has.

No matter if it’s “true” love or infatuation, her sign and what it implies should make us think. If you’re familiar with the Twilight series you will know that Edward is a very strong, mysterious, dedicated, committed, self-controlled man. Some critics have even called him controlling and chauvinistic. Hmmm…perhaps women actually like men who have those characteristics? (Ok minus the controlling, chauvinism ones, especially if they are unhealthy things in a relationship). Is that what that woman with the sign is wishing for when she says she’s “in love” with Edward? But seriously, in the hearts of women, when they are so honest with themselves, what do they really want out of a relationship with a man? They want security. They want commitment. They want to be loved, cherished and respected. All things Edward offers to Bella. (Even when Edward decides to leave Bella in New Moon he does it for her sake and eventually he comes back and is so committed to her). How does Bella respond to him? She longs to marry him. She wants nothing else than to be with him. She goes into deep depression when he leaves her, even though she knows it is for her good. She decides not to go to college so she can marry him and eventually become a vampire. She refuses to give up their baby, even though she knows it might kill her. How many women have you met lately who would say their deepest desire is to be a wife and a mother? Many women in our culture are saying instead they don’t need a man to fulfill them. They don’t need children. They must succeed in their careers and climb the corporate ladder. And yet, millions of women around this country are screaming and freaking out over a story that portrays a man who is not weak, a story that says a woman can be a wife and mother and obtain her heart’s desire. I would opinion that there is more to the freaking out and the signs and the obsession over these books/movies than actually meets the eye. (Seriously – Edward (Robert Pattison is not even that hot!) Could it be that in the heart of all women they desire to have a relationship that is marked by security and commitment? That they are actually calling out for men to step up and be men and give that to them?

Perhaps you think I’ve overreacting and overanalyzing a story. Perhaps you think I’m saying women shouldn’t go to college and should be barefoot and pregnant all the time. No – that’s not what I’m saying. I want to make that clear. I’m saying that culturally, women of my generation and a few previous generations have been taught to believe that we will never be satisfied unless we attempt in some way to be like men. That we should not embrace the wonderful things about being a woman – specifically the ability to give birth and raise a family. Does giving up our bodies and our dreams to have children require sacrifice? Yes – tremendous sacrifice. Does the end result produce immense joy, perhaps, in my opinion, more joy than climbing the corporate ladder? I think so. There’s lots of arguments for both sides and I’m just trying to figure this all out for myself right now. I felt like I needed to say something about the amazing amount of freaking out women/girls are doing over this movie and what I think it says about the culture we live in and the underlying issues that are there.

What do you think? I welcome your thoughts and comments.

P.S. I forgot to mention that Indiana University is offering a class this coming spring called “From Titanic to Twilight” “which will examine the culture of girls and young women as consumers and producers within pop culture.” I would hope that this class would go beyond just the role of women in media and actually dig deeper into the role of women in our culture. Here’s a link to the full article if you’re interested: http://www.idsnews.com/news/story.aspx?id=72034&search=twilight&section=search